By far, the most frequent question we get about our
adoption is, “Why not domestic adoption?” Why are we spending tens of thousands
of dollars to adopt a child half way around the world when there are so many
children right here in the United States who need a family?
We have absolutely nothing against adopting
domestically. Adoption is a wonderful thing! God Himself sets forth the example
of adoption, accepting as children those who are obedient to His word
(Galatians 4:5), regardless of gender or nationality. Those who choose to bring
a child into their home to love as their own display a beautiful picture of
Christ’s family. We 100% support Christians who adopt whether they are adopting
through the State, going the private domestic route, or heading overseas.
The oft-quoted statistic is that there are 153 million
orphaned children worldwide. This number includes children who have lost either
a mother or a father. Of that number, approximately 18 million children have
lost both parents, and are considered “double orphans”. That is a LOT of
children. Unfortunately, we cannot give a home to every one of these precious
little ones. What we can do right now
is work on providing a home to one child in need.
When we sat down and began seriously considering the
possibility of adoption, one of the things we discussed was how to decide which
child to adopt. It was a tough topic. How do you look at that number – 18
million double orphans – and decide which ONE you will bring into your home?
It is, of course, impossible to decide which orphaned
child is in most need of a home. Every
child is in need of a family! However, the current living conditions and likely
future of orphans in each country we looked at had a great deal of influence on
our decision to pursue international adoption. Our desire is to give hope to a
child who would otherwise grow up without a home, without a family, without
necessary medical care, and (most importantly) without spiritual training.
With this in mind, we began researching various
countries. Several factors limited our options. First, we were limited by my
age. Many countries require both parents to be over the age of 25 before
enrolling in a program. Some require both parents to be over 30. I just turned
24 and was barely 23 when we were ready to begin the process.
Second, we were limited because of how many children
we have (and intend to have). Many countries only allow you to have one or two
children already in the home. I am pregnant with our third blessing.
Third, we were limited by finances. We were convinced
(and still are) that the cost of the adoption should not be a deciding factor
in our decision. $40,000 is a lot of money, but our Heavenly Father paid a much
higher price to adopt us into His family. A child’s life is worth the price. As
long as we are doing what God wants and doing it God’s way, He will provide the
money in His timing. We weren’t just looking for the cheapest, fastest, easiest
option. However, some countries do have a minimum income requirement that we
did not meet.
Once we figured out which countries we qualified for
(Bulgaria, Uganda, The United States, Ethiopia, Peru, and several others), we
took a closer look at the condition of orphans in those countries. Of each
country, we asked, “What is life likely to hold for an orphan who is not
adopted?”
We were first drawn to Uganda, where orphans who age
out of the system at 16 years old are left with few ethical ways of making a
living (many girls turn to prostitution in order to survive). In fact, we were
in the Uganda program for several months. But at the time, Uganda’s adoption
process was very unstable and it was uncertain if we would ever be matched with
a child. For this and several other reasons we took a second look at the
countries we qualified for and reconsidered our options.
We prayed, sought advice, prayed, researched, and
prayed some more. And we kept coming back to Ethiopia, a country very similar to Uganda. In many of the countries
we looked at, orphans are at a definite disadvantage, but their basic needs are
met. For example, in the U.S., most orphans have access to food, clothing, and
medical care. That is not to say that every child will be well cared for, but
our country does a decent job of caring for the basic necessities of orphaned
children.
In Ethiopia….
·
1 in 8 children die before the age of 1
·
1 in 6 children die before the age of 5
·
At least 150,000 children live on the streets (some estimate
a much higher number). These children often turn to prostitution and thievery
for a living.
·
Approximately 5 million children in Ethiopia have lost one or
both parents. It is unknown exactly how many of those children are double
orphans. Ethiopia has one of the largest populations of orphans in the world.
·
14,000 children are born with HIV each year.
·
Around 800,000 children are orphaned by HIV/AIDS each year. The
rate of infection is increasing rapidly.
·
46% of the population is under the age of 15.
·
The country is struggling to recover from nearly 17 years of
civil war (1974-1991) and a widespread famine in the ‘80s. Ethiopia is an
extremely poor country and the resources to provide proper care for orphans is
limited.
Does this mean that Ethiopian orphans are in greater
need of a family than any other orphan? No. But there IS a need for orphans
from Ethiopia to be adopted. So why NOT adopt from Ethiopia? Is there a need
for children to be adopted from the U.S.? Of course! So, why aren’t we adopting
domestically? Because we are currently in the process of adopting from
Ethiopia.
